Long Distance Relationships

#1
I'm currently in a long-distance relationship. Does anyone here have any experiences with that? How do you guys manage the distance and stuff like time zone differences? Does it get easier or harder over time? What can I do to prepare myself for this?
 
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  • Indie

    Legendary Member
    Staff member
    #3
    I'm currently in a long-distance relationship. Does anyone here have any experiences with that? How do you guys manage the distance and stuff like time zone differences? Does it get easier or harder over time? What can I do to prepare myself for this?
    Don't do it, unless the distance is for a very short period. You will never know a person well enough as a partner unless you physically spend time with them on a regular basis.
     
    #4
    We've already been together for 6 months before my partner had to go back to the home country to help his family. Those 6 months are the most exciting, fun-filled and happiest moments of my life. That's why I'm really trying my best to figure out how long distance relationships work.
     

    Nasser

    Well-Known Member
    #5
    Only if this distance between you two is lasting for a known period that you can handle... if there is no timeframe for your reunion, it will only get harder and harder with time.
    Been there, and it is not easy.

    How much will he/she stay abroad? given that you already knew him/her before in person as you mentioned, you could probably sacrifice and wait for some time. Is it few months? A year? I'd say both sides would start to lose interest the longer it gets. Keeping a relation requires effort, it is not just 'love keeping you together', and the longer you're apart the more efforts it is required.
     

    Indie

    Legendary Member
    Staff member
    #6
    We've already been together for 6 months before my partner had to go back to the home country to help his family. Those 6 months are the most exciting, fun-filled and happiest moments of my life. That's why I'm really trying my best to figure out how long distance relationships work.
    Yes...it is always wonderful at the beginning :) I don't want to rain on your parade; but, sometimes, you can be with someone for years and be shocked by what you discover. Especially if you haven't been immunized against blind love. And, by the looks of it, you haven't :p

    And when someone is far, it is much easier for them to hide their bad sides, or for you to overlook red flags.

    Basically, normal relationships are risky and difficult as is. Distance will only multiply the risks and difficulty.

    Unless, as I said, the distance is for a short, pre-determined time. Never wait for a guy who doesn't give you clear commitments. He will waste your time and string you along while he figures out his life. Remember: men have more time than women.

    I suggest you kindly tell him that you don't want to end up having your time wasted, and that he needs to give you reasonable assurances and time frames. If he cares about you, he will understand. If he gets scared and runs, count yourself lucky you did not waste longer on him.

    May I ask what the home country is? Do you mean Lebanon?
     

    Isabella

    The Queen Of "Bazella"
    Orange Room Supporter
    #7
    I would advise against long distance relationships, I never tried being in one and actually made it a point not to date someone I liked very much because he was leaving in 3 months... However I was infatuated with my husband when he was in a long distance relationship, nothing happened between us until he broke it off with her of course, but she still hates my guts for "stealing her man" lol!
     

    Iron Maiden

    Well-Known Member
    #8
    What a bunch of party poopers in this thread!

    Long distance is good if u know ur partner enough and can actually be fun as long as you know how to kjeep in touch and just put some effort into it.

    I did it for 2.5 years and dont regret it, planned and visited more countries than i ever thought i would to meet and pass time with my gf and the coitus was always better.

    U do miss out on som aspects of a normal standing relationship but u gain in other parts. You have more time time to work and improve yourselves and your careers if you’re still young.

    But the commitment must be there or else just abandon ship because u’ll be fighting all the time and jealousy will consume u both
     

    Isabella

    The Queen Of "Bazella"
    Orange Room Supporter
    #9
    What a bunch of party poopers in this thread!

    Long distance is good if u know ur partner enough and can actually be fun as long as you know how to kjeep in touch and just put some effort into it.

    I did it for 2.5 years and dont regret it, planned and visited more countries than i ever thought i would to meet and pass time with my gf and the coitus was always better.

    U do miss out on som aspects of a normal standing relationship but u gain in other parts. You have more time time to work and improve yourselves and your careers if you’re still young.

    But the commitment must be there or else just abandon ship because u’ll be fighting all the time and jealousy will consume u both
    Is she still your girlfriend :p?
     

    mrsrx

    New Member
    Orange Room Supporter
    #11
    What a bunch of party poopers in this thread!

    Long distance is good if u know ur partner enough and can actually be fun as long as you know how to kjeep in touch and just put some effort into it.

    I did it for 2.5 years and dont regret it, planned and visited more countries than i ever thought i would to meet and pass time with my gf and the coitus was always better.

    U do miss out on som aspects of a normal standing relationship but u gain in other parts. You have more time time to work and improve yourselves and your careers if you’re still young.

    But the commitment must be there or else just abandon ship because u’ll be fighting all the time and jealousy will consume u both
    I feel ya...did 4 years of that but now its done been over for a few year...and at some point i regret it took 4 years to be over! It was difficulty after another and plans that failed after the other.
    The distance is playable if its done right it was never the only reason we split after 8 years! On the bright side and after much depression and a horrible lost period im now in one that is not on webex :p and i got the other part of it as i was too young in the first 4

    If won't judge if it is feasable or livable as each couple has their own dynamics.... but i personally enjoy the small things not the big plans
     

    Iron Maiden

    Well-Known Member
    #12
    I feel ya...did 4 years of that but now its done been over for a few year...and at some point i regret it took 4 years to be over! It was difficulty after another and plans that failed after the other.
    The distance is playable if its done right it was never the only reason we split after 8 years! On the bright side and after much depression and a horrible lost period im now in one that is not on webex :p and i got the other part of it as i was too young in the first 4

    If won't judge if it is feasable or livable as each couple has their own dynamics.... but i personally enjoy the small things not the big plans
    How old were u at the time if its not too intrusive?
    I’ve found that Maturity plays a big part in being able to handle it.
     

    mrsrx

    New Member
    Orange Room Supporter
    #13
    How old were u at the time if its not too intrusive?
    I’ve found that Maturity plays a big part in being able to handle it.
    pretty young...and maturity counts bass as all i would say it needs to be not open ended with a clear realistic plan
     

    NAFAR

    Well-Known Member
    #14
    Long distance relationship is only workable if it is for a defined period of time and with firm commitments.
    I did it with my GF (she is now my wife) for almost 2 years when I was working in UAE and she was living in Lebanon.
    During these 2 years, I visited Lebanon many times and was in touch on daily basis with her.
    It worked because it was after 5 years relationship/love and we were both determined that it is only for a short period and eventually we will be together.
    If your relationship is serious -in my case it was a mandatory period that i have to go thru to be able to get married with the love of my life- then go for it; otherwise you will be tormenting each other for nothing.
     

    Muki

    Well-Known Member
    Orange Room Supporter
    #19
    I'm currently in a long-distance relationship. Does anyone here have any experiences with that? How do you guys manage the distance and stuff like time zone differences? Does it get easier or harder over time? What can I do to prepare myself for this?
    It works, and it doesn't. Maybe it will work for you, maybe it won't.
    The most important thing you gotta remember is not to dupe yourself. As soon as you see signs it ain't working, then it ain't working. Sorry, I can't tell you the signs. Protip: if you or your partner are the jealous type, then it's best you end it now. Protip #2: communication is key to shortening the distance while apart.

    Lived 3 years apart from my fiance, different states then different cities. Same time zone, which made it easier. Spoke every day, visited every two to three weeks, or surprise visits. Most holidays spent together. We shared life's moments even though we were physically apart. Wasn't a problem for us because we've been dating for 4 years prior, and we knew the time apart is temporary, meaning we knew exactly when it will be over.

    It comes down to the following questions: Do you see a future in the relationship? Does your partner share your sentiment? Are you or your partner willing to work to get past any obstacles you may (and will) encounter along the way? A no to any of these questions means you should not go forward with long distance relationship.
     
    #20
    Thank you all for your advice. I appreciate it. We decided to try long-distance but promised to one another to at least see each other every quarter and to only do it for a year. I think that it is not so bad. If we can pull it off, it just means that we really care about one another right? I think we can survive this if we really put our minds and heart to the end goal of being together in the future. We are also looking to try Regain to help us go through this phase of our relationship. It is definitely all or nothing for us.
     

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